A Thousand Miles
by shinigami82
Summary: Quatre sings a song dedicated to his lost love whilst he's not there to witness it...


A Thousand Miles By: Shinigami82  
  
Quatre is trying to calm himself down as he stretches his fingers slightly. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, and let it all out. He opens his eyes just to look at his reflection in the mirror, observing his tux whether he needs to fix anything. There are over 150 contestant tonight, and he is going to try his best to win the Piano competition, knowing that he has been practicing hard. Everyone he knows are coming. His comrades, the Gundam boys, Iria, his dearest sister to give him the full support. All except one, the person he has been wanting to attend, the person he dedicates this performance to, the person who he had hurt him the most... Trowa Barton.  
  
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Duo is knocking on the door, checking up on Quatre by getting up from his seat, leaving the other sitting. He found most of the performance are boring, and he started to annoy Heero by shifting a lot in his seat. The suit, on top of it, is making him goddamn uncomfortable.  
  
Upon hearing the knocks, Quatre opened the door. He is certainly pleased to see his friend came to visit him although his performance is still kinda a long way. Duo, after all, is a person he turns to whenever he has problems in his mind. Although he is a joker, friendship is no laughing matter for Duo.  
  
"Duo!! You're here!! Is everyone here too?" Quatre asked without mentioning any names. Knowing that Trowa is most definitely not coming.  
  
"Yup, they are all here to watch you, Q-man!" he came in and gives his friend a hug. "How's everything going? I hope you're not nervous. Or are you?" Duo continued, not letting Quatre answer first, realizing that his friend's hands are trembling slightly.  
  
"Ha-ha.. a little.."  
  
"Don't be, I know you can do this! You're brilliant! Pretend that you play just like when you're at home, no one's watching! Be confident!" Duo gave his friend a pat at the back.  
  
"Thanks, Duo.. Don't know what I would do without you..." Quatre face fell, looking down to the floor.  
  
"Anytime you need me, Q-man..." Duo suddenly becomes alert, upon hearing a number being called out. He realized that a few after that, it would be Quatre's turn. He wants to give his friend a chance to practice a bit more before the actual thing. "Well, I better get back to my seat, ne?"  
  
Quatre gave him a slight nod and a smile.  
  
"I know you can do it..." Duo reached for the doorknob and on his way out, he turned to face his friend again, and gave him a wink. "G'luck!!"  
  
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Quatre takes his steps to reveal himself from the backstage, heading to the grand piano that lays in the middle of the stage. On his way there, he can hear his name being called as an introduction. He doesn't know whether he was imagining it or not, but he thinks he can hear Duo is yelling his name out loud. He wanted to laugh, but he realizes that that is not such a brilliant idea.  
  
The next second, he takes a seat and lays both of his hands on the ivory instrument and starts to play the notes. As the time comes, he opens his mouth, starting to sing;  
  
"Making my way downtown, Walking fast, faces passed, And I'm home bound...  
  
In a flash, an image of Trowa comes in his mind. He is smiling, the smile he rarely shows to anyone but him.  
  
"Staring blankly ahead, Just making my way, Making my way.. Through the crowd..."  
  
A rush of memory from the past came to haunt him. He can see Trowa's smile, he can feel Trowa's touch, and most of all, he can taste Trowa's lips, still clear in his mind as if it happened last night.  
  
"And I need you, and I miss you, and now I wonder..."  
  
He remembers how those forest green eyes are more than just loneliness,... they hold sadness, sorrow and grief.  
  
"If I could fall into the sky, Do you think time, Would pass me by? Coz you know I'd walk a thousand miles If I could just see you Tonight..."  
  
But Quatre knew how to break the ice. He comforted him, he gave him his dreams, he offered his helpful hands just to make those beautiful green eyes glimmer with happiness, joy and bliss.  
  
"It's always times like this When I think of you And I wonder If you ever think of me.."  
  
Quatre remembers for the past month how he always reflects back on his memory with Trowa. Trowa who was always looking depressed and quiet, started to open up with Quatre, he shared his darkest secrets, that he was an assassin with no name...  
  
"Everything's so wrong And I don't belong Living in your precious memories..."  
  
Quatre was surprised, it was very unexpected, nothing like he had in mind. But Quatre did not care, he loves him, always has and always will. He remembered that he embraced Trowa tightly, accepting Trowa no matter who he was.  
  
"Coz I need you and I miss you and now I wonder..."  
  
Quatre did not care, as long as Trowa loves him back, just like the way Quatre has been loving him all along. Just like those moments they met each other for the first time. Quatre had fallen desperately in love with him.  
  
"If I could fall Into the sky Do you think time Would pass me by? Coz you know I'd walk a thousand miles If I could just see you Tonight..."  
  
He closed his eyes as he remembered the night they made love, the night when they were one, the night when they shared their emotions and their passions. And four little words, just those little words which Quatre thought they were the right ones to express his sincerity; "Trowa, I love you..."  
  
"And I, I Don't want to let you know.."  
  
And yet Trowa pushed him away.  
  
"I, I Drown in your memory.."  
  
Making a distance between himself and Quatre.  
  
"I, I Don't want to let this go.."  
  
Saying that he doesn't deserve to be loved, saying that Quatre deserved someone better.  
  
"I, I Don't...."  
  
Saying that he couldn't hold and embrace Quatre with those hands that spilled by blood.  
  
"Making my way downtown Walking fast Faces passed And I'm home bound.."  
  
When he finally opened his eyes, he could feel that his eyes are starting to water, and he finds difficulty of actually holding back his tears, but he tries...  
  
"Staring blankly ahead Just making my way Making my way Through the crowd.."  
  
He looks up to the audience and finds his comrades on their seats, looking back at him in concern. Especially the look of Duo that Quatre cannot stand, so he decides to look away at the entrance and caught a very familiar figure standing there.  
  
"And I still need you And I still miss you And now I wonder...."  
  
Quatre decides to hold his gaze on that figure. Although he cannot see very clearly , but he is sure that it is Trowa...  
  
"If I could fall Into the sky.."  
  
Now he can feel Trowa's eyes on him as he looks back at Trowa  
  
"Do you think time Would pass us by?"  
  
He slightly changed the words as they are dedicated to Trowa  
  
"'Cause you know I'd walk A thousand miles If I could Just see you..."  
  
Duo realized that behaviour of Quatre, and looks back at the entrance only to discover what Quatre really meant seeing Quatre's most loved one is frozen there.  
  
"If I could fall Into the sky Do you think time Would pass me by?"  
  
Quatre cannot hold back anymore. He can feel his hot tears running down his cheeks. And his words are almost choked in his throat but he told himself to keep on going.  
  
"'Cause you know I'd walk A thousand miles If I could Just see you.."  
  
He wants Trowa to know how he really feels and how he wants to hold him so...  
  
"If I could Just hold you Tonight..."  
  
He plays his last notes as his eyes are starting to blur from his tears, but he wants to finish the performance down to the last note.  
  
When he finally finished, there is a slight pause from the audience, but in a second or two, they are clapping for his brilliant performance. In trembling hands and a slightly shaking body he stands up and takes his bow. He doesn't want his comrades to know how he sheds tears by hiding his eyes behind his bangs.  
  
But he is bad in hiding his emotions, that Duo knows exactly how he feels, Quatre has always been very emotional. Duo decides to stands up and go to backstage to check how his best-mate going as Quatre is walking to the backstage after he took his bow. Duo quickly brings his eyes to look at the entrance where that familiar figure had stood. But he wasn't there anymore.  
  
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Backstage, Quatre is hoping that the figure he saw at the entrance was just an illusion. And yet at the same time, he was hoping that it was real. He can still feel his tears streaming down his cheeks, feeling his heart beats slightly faster. He forgot that he didn't close the door properly, as someone walks in quietly without Quatre realizing it.  
  
"Quatre..." said a calm and very familiar voice that Quatre missed so much.  
  
Quatre gasps as he didn't expect anyone to come to his change room and turns around to find Trowa leaning against the wall next to the door. He dresses nicely and his familiar, loving scent filled the air. Quatre wants so much to embrace him, but afraid if Trowa would pull away, again.  
  
"I.. I thought you wouldn't come..." Quatre said as he sobs quietly.  
  
"I came to see you.." Trowa said calmly, his eyes still on Quatre.  
  
"Whatever for? I thought you said I deserve someone better! When I said I didn't care, you just walked away from me!" Quatre slightly raised his tone without realizing his tears coming down again. He didn't want to show that he is so powerless against Trowa, that he is lost without his presence.  
  
"I came to told you.. that I'm sorry.." Trowa now bows is head, ignoring his pride for the one that he finally realized is his love of a lifetime.  
  
"What..?" Quatre can't believe of what he said, ".. at first you walked away on me, and now you want to come back to me? Is it so fun to play with my feelings that you just came to see me without giving it a thought? What kind of...." Quatre cannot finish his sentence, as he feels Trowa embraced him so tightly.  
  
"Please don't say that.. I was confused, I cared so much about your feelings that I didn't even realize that I was hurting you... Please, Quatre.. please forgive me.. I'm so lost without you..."  
  
Quatre is standing there in Trowa's arms, frozen, not knowing what to say. But he finally melt and close his eyes as he wraps his arms around Trowa's back.  
  
"I've forgiven you all along, long before you asked for forgiveness, even when you decided to walk away on me. I've forgiven you all along, Trowa.... It's because I love you..." Quatre cries again, but now it's tears of happiness as Trowa's hold not once loosening.  
  
Trowa pulls away, only to cup his hands in Quatre's face as he closes the space between them. Quatre closes his eyes as Trowa kisses him gently on the lips. They are sharing a passionate kiss, as Duo smiling gently outside the door, glad to see his best-mate finding is happiness once again.  
  
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End file.
